Heft by Liz Moore

I thought this was pretty poor. Like 2/5. Don't understand why it's so highly recommended as a book club book. Sadness. 

Nightengale by Kristen Hannah

I ready Nightengale by Kristen Hannah.

It was lovely. I highly recommend this one. WWII - story of two sisters and their different approaches to how to handle the war and their roles in it.

I listened through audiobook, would like to actually read one day. 

Been a While!

I just finished reading The Devil in the White City by Erik Larson.

The ending was way better than the beginning. Really proud that I finished this one - nonfiction's not my typical genre. The middle was hard for me to get through. On many occasions, I found myself barely resisting the temptation to skim the architectural sections of the book to hurry to the sections about "H. H. Homes". I did learn about architecture and I'd honestly never heard about this fair before. I appreciated Larson's narrative voice in this matter. It was interesting to see parts of my everyday world woven into the history of this fair, their origins in this forgotten World Fair. I yearned for a bit more on the serial killer side of the tale, but I guess that's what made him so great at being a serial killer. He didn't leave too much behind. 

Day 2

Been a rough day but I'm refocusing. Got the big ticket items taken care of, get to see the sun and it's a lovely, almost warm outside kind of day. Took a break from the office to walk myself into peace and breathe through these knots in my shoulders. I'm happy I have fresh air to breathe and I'm looking forward to seeing Jill next week. So so excited.

Back to the office.

Day 1

I like the idea of this fad that's going on right now... "100 Happy Days", at the very least, it's a cool way yo intentionally take a moment to meditate on gratitude each day.

So I'll give it a go.

Day 1. I went shopping, felt like an adult, am in both a size smaller dress size & pants size & celebrated by buying a hot pink and polka dotted dress I'd never be caught dead wearing before.

Then I came home to my over-affectionate feline.

And so it begins...

I've been on a reduced calorie diet for two weeks. And it worked a bit. I lost some weight. Then my cravings & mood swings took over... in combination with work stress and the weather.

It's now a week later and during that week I did not follow the diet, mostly due to the fact that I did not go grocery shopping on Sunday to properly prepare food for the week.That being said, I've been eating healthily, just not a strict calorie reduced diet. So I guess lifestyle changes are good...?

Anyways, I'm beginning the Southbeach Diet tomorrow. I grocery shopped today for vegetables, most of which I'd not even heard the names of before... nor do I know how to cook them (leek?! The thing that that one pokemon carries around in it's wing all the time?) So wish me luck. Phase I is 14 days long, and apparently the most difficult. It helps curb sugar cravings. #leggo.

Now It Is Written

The blog I'm looking for hasn't been written yet.

For the past several months, I've been scouring the internet, getting on old favorites like Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Buzzfeed... I've read countless lists (which is inherently ironic, I know). The topics have ranged all over the place, but clearly the target audience is my peer group of "20-somethings" who in response to being cast aside by other age groups, has banded together in solidarity in the form of temporarily satisfying and mutely and temporarily inspirational lists. Since I've met Robin, the them has narrowed significantly. I've found myself clicking on "how do you know he's interested", "17 Signs You're in Love"... and all sorts of other vague, repetitive, and intriguing posts... trying to find something that resonates with me. 

For a while, I started trying to find these same posts or lists on happiness. Not the typical, "How to find happiness", or "How to Be Happy Right Now with this list of tips"... but a reflection on someone's experience who is truly and purely happy as they are, right now, in the very current moment, without any guilt on the matter. 

Good luck finding that, my friends. Apparently, I'm the only one on all of the internet that is pleased with my current situation, at least enough so to try to identify how I'm feeling might be explained by others. That seems to be either quite a boring topic... or something that few are interested in on the whole. 

So I'm writing what I can't find. Because really, what I'm looking to read is someone who identifies with my situation, uses words to describe how I'm feeling, and who, by doing so, gives me permission to experience the joy that is ravaging my soul, often guiltless for doing so. Why can't I give that to myself?

So this is how I've been feeling: 

• I am so grateful every day for everything I have been given in this life. You can argue that I've earned a lot of it - I work hard. I am a perfectionist. I am dedicated and strong. I believe in dreams and I work for them. A telling quote dedicated to me back in high school was: "Always aim for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land amongst the stars." (Clement). That being said, I have been given so much. I have an incredibly supportive family, amazing and inspirational friends, the job of a lifetime... In fact, I feel like I have a life of a lifetime. If that makes sense... and now I've met this amazing man. 
• I am in love. During the week, in the middle of the rest of my